Add/adhd - whats wrong with me?

You could try talking to a guidance counselor at school- they would be able to talk your parents into allowing treatment with a psychiatrist. Your regular doctor might even be able to help you-you could call on your own. You do have issues that need to be worked out. Maybe you have ADD or OCD or anxiety/depression- this should be evaluated. You are suffering more than usual teen angst and there is no reason why you should not be permitted to seek help. If you feel like you might hurt yourself, go to the emergency room- they will help you even if your parents "don't believe in psych disorders". Good luck, please don't turn to self destructive behaviors (cutting, drugs) because that will make things worse. Please just try to reach out for treatment.